After thoughts on Christmas and family.

As I sit in front of my Mac working on everything for my Podcast, I quickly remembered I marked out this time to get started on my new ‘weekly’ blog… I just ate up all that time working on getting content for our first cross-over show with Graphic Novice for 2016 and trying to get our first show of 2016 set up. At least I am working on the show, so that is good news. I had planned on doing a little research about doing a blog, like how to get started and any tips people could help with...fuck it!

I should find a subject to cover, but I am usually all over the place and I worry if I lock myself down to one subject matter I may just quit because I either lose interest or just get over with it. My big hurdle is being consistent, so each week I will just go by the seat of my pants and cover whatever is on my mind.

Last week was Christmas and it was our Reese’s first Christmas. Remembering back when it was Jillian’s first Christmas I thought about how easy it was. No standards, no high hopes, just bright lights and some new toys and clothes that she didn’t really care about, Jillian was only 2 months old so it made it really easy. Reese was the same this year, which made it easier to only have to worry about 1 child being disappointed.

Quite the opposite! I was fully surprised and completely relieved when Jillian finished opening all her presents and had a huge smile on her face. That night when she was getting in bed she thanked me and her mom for such a perfect Christmas. I teared up knowing that even though I felt like it wasn’t great, she loved it. But as a parent do you ever feel like you’ve done enough? Can’t we always do better? Now with the holidays over, maybe we can get back into our normal routine and not have to stress about entertaining anyone, putting too much pressure on ourselves and just get back to work.

We started a couple new traditions this year, I hope we can keep them going and make them part of Jillian and Reese’s happy memories when they get older! On Christmas Eve we went out for Chinese food and then went for some coffee and hot cocoa, drove around looking at Christmas lights. For me looking back, my memory is shit. I can see small segments and they don’t always fit together, I remember the feelings I had, but the actual memories are crap. I can thank concussions for that… I want both of them to be able to look back and remembered how hard their mom and I worked to make sure they had everything they needed and were surrounded with happiness, joy and love. I think we have put too much stress on what is under the tree, rather than what we do around the tree. You can go out and return the gift and get what you want but you can’t go back in time and re-live those moments! A tough lesson I learned through losing my mom, but that's another topic for another day. For our household Christmas was wonderful and we made a lot of great memories.

Thanks for reading and hopefully I can keep this going.

Ryan.

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